Happy Birthday!

Today is my step-sons 14th Birthday!

We have sole- custody. She has an "alleged" drug problem. I say alleged so that I don't get into any trouble for slander or liable. I could pull court records and arrest records to prove such "allegedness", but I won't. At any rate, the last time she called to talk to her son was Christmas - OF LAST YEAR! She saw him on his birthday last year too. Bought him an iPod shuffle with like ALL her money and told him that was all she had too. Nice, make your kid feel like shit on his birthday cause you bought him a gift.
Hasn't called all year. We weren't sure if she was still in the area for a while. Until I saw her on the County Sherrif arrest site anyways. So we knew she was at least alive and where she was for a month or so. But still no letters, no phone calls, no nothing. Poor kid. But you know, I think...no I know he's better off without her.
Her father, his grandfather, sees him on a semi-regular basis. But he has no idea where his mother is either. Well I mean he has a general idea and tries to "smooth over" (read bullshit us) what's going on with her. (I think he fails to realize that all that arrest stuff in a matter of public record and I can just go look it up at the courthouse.)
I mean she listed herself as an "unemployed escort" on her arrest record for christ's sake!
Ken's had Matty since he was 7 (maybe 8). She dropped him off one day (this is what I heard) and said that she had things to take care of. That was the BEST thing she ever did for her son. The only inkling of mothering she ever showed in my opinion. The only selfless thing she's probably ever done.
You would think that after this womans younger sister died (i think it was an overdose - the family says otherwise) while she was in Prison she would learn, but nope!
You would think that after my own issues with drug use, I might be a little more understanding - NOPE!
As soon as I learned I was pregnant - stopped! That is someone elses life. I can fuck mine up all i want - not some innocent little one's life! There's no excuse for what she does. Especially to Matt.
Shortly after their divorce was finalized, we needed to go back to court to ammend the visitation agreement. She received Supervised visitation, due to her "drug issues". (But it's just alleged remember). We got word thru her father that if she couldn't see her son where and when she wanted - then she didn't want to see him at all. Nice message to pass along to your child, huh?
At any rate, our lives are just fine without her. I'm truly sorry for Matt, that he can't enjoy a "normal" relationship with his mother. But I honestly think he's better off withouth her.

I love Matt. I hope he doesn't dwell too much that she didn't call. I hope he had a great day today.

Happy Birthday Son! I love you!

Brooklyn's Toby

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Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

This is a special post just for Blondefabulous. You see, she has a Yorkie , who is undeniably adorable. Well, My daughter Brooklyn, just recently noticed this. She goes running into her room yelling "I have one of those!" And promptly shoves this (what you see in the picture) into my face "SEE!". As a result of seeing Toby, she has renamed her fake puppy Toby.
This fake puppy has its own carrying bag (in picture), collar, leash, coat (in picutre). This was not a Christmas present. She has, however, found renewed interest in it ever since realizing that a friend of mine has a real one just like it.
For that Ms. Fabulous, I must thank you. Toby goes with us EVERYWHERE in her bag. i get asked to buy dog food for her. And real toys again. She's even fearful that if Toby and our REAL cat get into a fight - we'll have to get rid of the dog! Oh to have the imagination of a year old again!

My Pea Coat

My Pea Coat
Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

My husband is the best ever! There were 2 things I wanted - aPea Coat and a new mouse for my computer. I got BOTH!! I love him bunches!!!

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Brooklyns Pics 003
Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

These are the sleigh bells that Santa left at our house!!

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Brooklyns Pics 031
Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

Poppy in the snow!

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Brooklyns Pics 016
Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

This is the pic she wanted to take of the Yule Log that Blondefabulous made for us!!

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Brooklyns Pics 009
Originally uploaded by nicolesmeier

Our daughter got a camera (well 2) for Christmas this year! I have taken the liberty of uploading ALL the pics that she took - shom are quite amusing! Like this one of Viking daddy

Am i a bad parent?

I see how others act with their kids. Well what they want me to see anyways, but I can't help to wonder if I'm alone in how I treat my kids. Like if I write this, is there some weirdo who will think im being cruel or something and try and turn me in??
I'm not a lovey dovey mommy. I'm just not. I have no patience for small children and this makes me feel like the worlds WORST mother. I don't want to play tea, or ponies or G I joes either. I don't bake, I don't clean real well, I'm not that organized, hell I'm still a big lazy kid myself - I'm in college for Chirst's sake!
See as I was growing up - my mother didn't do "Mommy" stuff either. She worked and was out of the house by 7am and home after 5;30pm. I was a latch key kid in Kindergarten. Yup that's right, at the age of 5 i was walking home by myself and then waiting for my mom to come home a little after 5:30. I was also an only child.
Oh sure my mom and I did stuff together like learn how to do the laundry, and the Girl Scouts she forced me to do. And the church she forced me to attend. We only attended church because her friends went there and she "taught" the kindergarten Sunday school class. We are NOT a religious family. I'm okay with that.
I yell. A lot. A whole lot. She was away for a week and I was glad! Now I feel wrong. Is it okay to be happy your kids are gone? Does anyone else get sick of their kids or am I the only one? Or am I the only one brave enough to admit they get sick of their kids? Don;t get me wrong - I love Brooklyn more than anything, but sometimes she drives me INSANE! It must be her age - 5 - i can get along fine with older kids and babies, but who doesn't love babies?
I don't think that it helps that where ever she goes - shes ALWAYS the center of attention. Because she thinks that this is the way things need to be at home. I can't even take a piss w/o her knocking on the door for something ridiculous. Which is probably precious to to others. But dammit I JUST WANT TO PEE! 2 minutes is all it will take - the precious "I love you" can wait 2 seconds. But then i get to thinking about the people who would give anything to have their kid be able to pester them while they pee and I feel guilty. Bad. Wrong. Ungrateful for what I have, but COME ON! IT'S JUST A PEE!
Constantly she's right behind me, like if I turn around too fast - I'll hurt her - honestly. I need some space - seriously. Everyone does. But I don't get it. It's maddening. Well for me anyways.
I love it when I have school and I have to go to work - because she can't go with me! It's like a vacation. I was not meant for little kids. I can only tolerate them in small doses. I give major credit to those with a lot of their own and those who work with them. I know I could NEVER EVER do it. I wish I could. I wish I was a better mom. But this is who I am. But does that make me a bad parent??

I got Accepted to College!

I got accepted to University of South Florida (USF) starting this Fall! I'm sooo excited! I just HAD to share that!

Okay so I'm sooo bad at hiding presents or surprises. If i could I'd give presents everyday. I bought Ken his Christmas present today (the BIG one) and I had to give it to him! The one sitting in the closet is what he can open on Christmas morning! I'm horrible. I have to wait for mine and that's okay. I'd rather give them, although I LOVE to get presents. Even my SIL, Michelle, knows what she is getting - I took her to the mall last week to pick out what she wanted! I think I'm going to have her help me wrap everything up!
I think I'm getting a Pea Coat - that's what I want. Well, that's what I told him i wanted like 2 months ago. He went shopping with his mom today to go get my present. He even saw us (me, Matt, Brooklyn and Michelle) at the Sarasota Mall today. Funny that we would turn up in the same place. You know what I couldn't believe? The number of stores that were going out of business in the mall! It was creepy! There had to be at least 5 of them. 2 of them were jewelery stores.
Other thoughts: I want to pierce my face. More specifically my nose, or on one side of my lip. Not the Angel Kiss (above the lip) or the Snake Bites (on both sides of the lip) but like on one side on the bottom. But I doubt that's going to happen :( Maybe someday. I had to take out my tongue ring. For a couple of reasons. 1. It really does mess up your teeth., 2. I couldn't leave it in for any of the jobs I found down here. It caused no concern at the Police Department I worked at, but Sweetbay says its a distraction and unprofessional. I can name several professionals that make a lot more money than me who probably have their tongues peirced. and 3. I kinda out grew it - it got old. I had it in for like 8 years. Now it's time for something different. And I'm guessing that if a piercing that one can hardly notice is against the dress code, one that is like right there on your face is out of the question too. Grr... that sucks.
I want more tattoos! I need my nautical stars! These would be okay as far as the job market is concerned because they'd be in the shoulder region, but my husband has requested that i refrain from gettin any more. I think that this too, sucks. I'm not sure if this is somewhat of a mid-life crisis thing, or just because I really like this stuff. Well i really like the tattoos. I wouldn't want to be covered or anything. I just have a few more ideas that I'd like to have done.
Hmmm.....didn't really convey anything of much merit here. Just some basic ramblings. Now that everyone is thoroughly bored...I'll go now

What You Might Want To Know

I guess I should fill some things in. Like who we are, what we do, and all that crap. I'll start with myself. I'm 31 and a fulll time college stoodent. Yup - I is a kollege stoodent. I'm studying to get my Bachelor's Degree in Microbiology. I am halfway there. I'll get my Associates Degree this summer - FINALLY! I have a part-time job with Sweetbay Supermarkets. Which is a local grocery store here in Florida. I work in the Liquor Store. I LOVE my job! The customers are awesome! I got married on August 9, 2008 to the most wonderful man, Kenny. Kenny and I met on the internet, thru Match.com - it really does work for some.
Kenny is 32 and is also a college stoodent. He's going for his Associates Degree in Computer Networking and Securities. He'll graduate this coming May. (He's maintaining a 4.0GPA to boot!) I'm so proud of him. He'll be the first in his family to get a college degree. He's not working right now. Back in January 2006 he fell 3 stories off of a lanai (porch). He hurt himself pretty good and as a result was put on Worker's Compensation. It took over 2 years and 4 surgeries, but his doctor finally fixed him up pretty good. What he hurt most severly was his left wrist - it is now fused, partialy, to his arm. He spends pretty much most of his free time playing World of Warcraft - or watching the History Channel.
Matty will be 14 in just a few (10) days. He's in the 8th grade. He volunteers every other Saturday at an Animal Shelter. He likes to read, play Rockband for Wii, and hang out with his friends. He is my step-son. I could elaborate more on that, but out of respect for him I won't. (well not now anyways) There is however TONS of bloggy goodness around that subject - it may come out one day. (It most likely will when I start bitching about his non-existant mother, er, egg donor). <----see there I go.... And last, but not least Brooklyn Grace. She's 5 going on 25. Her birthday is 8 days past the cut off here in FL, so she will be in Kindergarten next year. When she's 6! She and her "Bubba" share one thing even though they are not biologically related. She has a donor too - a sperm donor. His rights were revoked by me. With VERY good reason. This August, a week after Ken & I were married - he adopted her. She doesn't know this. If she learns to read anytime soon - I guess she might figure it out. I haven't decided wether or not to tell her this information. The last time her donor saw her, she was 2 months old. Ken has been her daddy since she was 6 months old. She knows NO other. I'm afraid telling her would do more harm than good being as there's NO evidence as to another being her daddy - you know? She's REALLY into the Barbie movies. ALL of them! Over and over and over again. She likes to try and play Rockband for the Wii, but she's really good at Bowling on the Wii - she's reached Pro status! Oaky, okay - I'm really just bragging about my family here. I shall try and update daily on the happenings here at my house and at my job - sometimes those can be pretty interesting. And when school starts up again, I'm sure I'll be sharing my displeasure of homework, tests, and teachers with you all. (All 2 of you)! Oh and if there's something you'd like to know - wither because you're curious or because you didn't understand something, or whatever -ask me! If I think you're overstepping the noseyness quotient - I'll let ya know - don't you worry!

Claiming My Blog

So I have to "claim" my blog...



Undergoing MyBlogLog Verification

My First Time

So I decided this morning that i should blog. Not really sure how I came about that decision. I don't feel that my life is al that interesting, but every once in a while there's something that's just interesting enough. This post is very short, but I'm about to head off to work. I'll fill you all in with more when I'm home!